I'm bored!

Has a child or teen ever told you “I’m bored”? I would be shocked if you have never heard that. If you have not, then you have your child occupied. How do you have your child occupied? Like the picture that got you here, send your child outside to rake some leaves! Then you get to see your kids having a blast in a free activity!

When in the business of litigation custody disputes or representing children, as a practitioner I get exposed to all types of parents and their parenting styles. I also get exposed to child custody experts and the wealth of knowledge they possess. I cannot tell you how frequently I hear at Court or in my cases the problems parents have with their kid and the phone. Sometimes I feel like I would have less work if kids did not have phones. I am exposed to the issue of screens/phones with kids constantly.

Learning how to manage what your child does with his/her day regardless of a divorce requires creative parenting and a multitude of other factors. Let’s talk about being creative as a parent. Being creative while being a parent can be tough. Grabbing that phone or a screen and handing it to your kid is so tempting because you need time to breathe, cook dinner, finish working, shower, and the list goes on. Most all of us do it, including me. But trying to avoid your child starring at a screen has it’s benefits. Following through on this can be tough as well because you can be tired as a parent. Parents work, try to parent effectively, drive children to their activities, you have to feed your children and hopefully give them a nutritious meal when you can, and then maybe you try to have a what looks like a life yourself.

What is the benefit of keeping your child occupied with activities other than a screen? I think you know the answer. Children like to play outside. Playing outsides releases energy. Playing with friends, if they have neighbors teaches them to socialize, have fun, and resolve disputes, or not, but all are great tools for individuals to learn. Children like to help. They want to contribute. Children are capable of doing chores. Doing chores gives a child confidence to be independent. Plus, this helps you save time: it’s a win win. They may not do it right the first time but eventually they’ll figure it out and improve with practice. Learning to read and build on comprehension helps to communicate. Learning to communicate builds independence in the body because they are free to express themselves. Children can play games. Cards are easy to play, as are other board games. Siblings that learn to play with each other learn social skills and dispute resolution they can use for life.

Playing with parents is a great option too, if you can manage it. The fact is that you may be tired. it’s important though to take time with your kids too. Taking 10 minutes for your kids may feel like more time to them if it’s engaged quality time.

Here’s some other ideas when your child tells you they are bored: ride bikes, wipe down the counter tops, organize cabinets, write a story, write a poem, draw, lay on your bed quietly until you figure out what to do, just be bored, read, do math, write thank you notes, play music, act, dance, and the list goes on and on and on…. But again, grain of salt. We all generally use screens; you are looking at this one! Just some food for thought on other options for your kids when they say “I’m bored.”